Jonathan's Soapbox

This page first posted 15 November 1998.


No wonder Australian phrases fascinate the Americans... they are mostly lewd. "We'll be rooting for you!" said a friend about Kay giving birth. "You wouldn't be in Australia", I quip, "...because there the word `root' means to engage in sexual congress." Oooh.
Then we tell them what the singer Randy Van Warmer's name translates into, and they cack themselves. Actually they don't cack themselves, they cackle at best, chuckle if they speak English English, or simply laugh. It's like driving on the pavement, which is required by law here.
Mention of bonking raises eyebrows, but solely because of its onomatapoeic guessability. Here you can fall on your fanny in public. Your fanny and your butt are interchangeable, linguistically. They do not know how to "pull their fingers out" here either.

It's not a nation with a convict mentality so much. It's a nation with an inability to euphemise.

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